Friday, 3 June 2016

Backsides and Bra lines

I have never been a skinny person. I have massive tits and wobbly thighs and I drink too much cider to have a flat stomach but since having children I feel like blancmange!

I used to always have a fat face and bat wings, but now, weirdly, I have a jawline, (I am sure, in part, as a result of constantly clenching it when trying not to scream at a toddler who is eating his rice one grain at a time!) and no smaller bat wings..hummingbird wings? from carrying 2 small children in and out of the house a million times a day.

But now, now I'm fat in different places, I have replaced my moon face with back fat and a balloon belly. The back fat is what really gets me, even when I was actually just fat I never had back fat. Now my backside basically starts at my bra line! It is disturbing!

Having two babies in 18 months has left my fat skin devoid of any elasticity so I am like a balloon that has been inflated and deflated too many times, a bit saggy and sad looking.

Thankfully my baby is a little fatty and she is quite literally milking the fat off my back. The back crack is more of a slight back cleavage now but I am dreading the day I take her off the boob. Partly because I love feeding her, but mostly because it means it will be harder to lose any more weight, or to be honest, just to not put any back on.

The reality already is, the less milk she drinks the more wine I do! After 9 months of pregnancy and 4 months of exclusive breastfeeding I am already taking every opportunity to get 'on it'!

I haven’t decided yet which one would make me happier, guzzling wine or a not fat back. I fear I cant have them both!


  1. Back fat - before I had my second baby I thought this was a thing that happened to other more unfortunate people and yet here I am with a big fat back! *sigh* I'm obviously not bothered enough because as I type this I'm guzzling both wine and chocolate...Hmmm. Thanks for giving me a giggle and sharing on my linky #fortheloveofBLOG x

    1. Ha! Wear that fat with pride! 😂 If only there were a back fat emoji!!

  2. I've just stopped breastfeeding - I found last time that the two months between stopping and getting pregnant again (another eejit here!) was when the fat came off.

    Is it now? Maybe if I stopped eating oreos it might...

    Thanks for linking to #chucklemums :D

  3. Feeling this one sister!! #chucklemums